Perhaps you have difficulty enjoying when there are emotional troubles attached, such as with your off and on bf, whom you admit has a series of ex gfs you worry yourself about. My suggestion is to try out this water thing at the public pool near my house and try to forget your bf. That was a joke. Seriously, perhaps you will enjoy more with someone other than your off/on bf. You might need to get your emotions straight before having with anyone however. By all means, learn to enjoy ual stimulation by yourself, and perhaps you might feel more confident about your enjoyment when you do finally decide to involve another person.
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